What a delightful and engaging post, Ilona. It unfolds like the pace of your walks. You bring the inner world to life in ways that are easy to relate to!
Thanks, Chris. I'm glad to take you along with the ordinary things that happen to me. I'm not telling a big compelling story, but hopefully one that touched your heart.
To me, the big story here is how you worked with mindful awareness of your reactions, such that you weren't ruled by them and instead found a way to connect with someone very different from you.
I love the way you write! While reading this I wish for you to write a novel someday. A book to hold with thick pages that have raw edges. The cover would draw us in without a word needed. I see your photo on the back cover with your bright smile and cool glasses. Your bio would be somehow woven into the story you would tell. xoxxo
Well, my dear friend, I do have in mind to write a memoir. In fact, I even have a book coach! Thanks for sharing my vision and for your friendship. You mean a lot to me!
Loved the post Ilona! Not something I would normally read but you drew me right in. I imagine we all have Franks in our lives. Thanks for sharing (even on a rerun!!)
Such a sweet story and I imagine your giving Frank your attention made a difference, even if you weren't aware of it. A man went to work for my husband's company and for awhile I just thought of him as one of the many people who, for whatever reason, had been down on his luck for many years. He struggled, and one job he could do, and do well, was man the parking lot booth at the local bank. He also offered to paint our back porch ceiling. It was hot that summer. As he stood on the ladder in the heat of the day, I made sure he stayed hydrated and brought him many glasses of ice water or iced tea., but then went back in the house and never really talked at length with him. Then he began to cough...a lot. It turned out he had lung cancer. My husband and I visited him in the hospital, and as far as we could tell, no one else came. When he passed away, the bank employees were heart-broken. Apparently, they loved him dearly and all had developed relationships with him. The bank had a bronze plaque made in his likeness with his name and put it on the parking lot booth in his honor. I felt like I never knew him like they did. It made me want to let people in and really get to know their story.
Wow, Linda. I can so relate to your story. I think Frank may also have been down on his luck, like many who live in that rooming house. My heart is glad that you visited your Frank in the hospital. I'm sure seeing you was a bright spot in his day. As Marylee Pangman said (above), we all know a Frank.
Ah. I relate to this letter. Not because of Frank, although I feel your pain. But because I have to walk our Sophie with the same caution. She is a sweetheart of a rescue. But she is nervous (long story for another time).
When I saw the picture of the kids (beautiful - and what a wise inquisitive look on the face of the little one!) it reminded me of our child care "job" during Covid. Daycare and preschool were shut down. We took two very young boys M-F so their parents could work from home. It felt good to make a difference and selfishly influence them in some tiny way that they might carry into adulthood.
Thanks, Bill! Polly is a rescue, too. We didn't want a pit but this breed is predominant at the shelters. She is actually the best dog ever, except for her leash aggression problem. Mostly she's just a scaredy cat. She is great with my grandkids though.
That’s such a touching story Ilona. You have immortalised Frank by telling story regardless of how little you knew him. I can already see him in my mind. Brilliant post.
Oh Ilona, this is so beautiful! I love hearing about how you taught yoga to people with issues - i.e. any of us, really - prior to Covid. How you felt nervous at first when Frank showed up on the street. How you gradually warmed to him, at least a little. And then the shock when he died, and you thought of all the questions you wish you'd asked. I'll be thinking about this piece for a while. Thanks for re-sharing it.
I have had some bad situations with men, if you remember my post about the Bear a few months ago. You made a comment on that post as well. So no, I wasn't open and friendly to Frank, but he didn't seem put off by it. I think everything unfolded as intended by the universe, if you believe in that type of thing. I believe both Frank and I were enriched by our brief encounter.
Ilona Goanos: Thank you for reposting this beautiful reflection which says so much about your love and compassion, which makes me very glad to have come to know you.
I love the little kids!
May Frank and all who encounter you with their tragedies find persons to comfort and love them. May Frank rest in peace!
What a delightful and engaging post, Ilona. It unfolds like the pace of your walks. You bring the inner world to life in ways that are easy to relate to!
Thanks, Chris. I'm glad to take you along with the ordinary things that happen to me. I'm not telling a big compelling story, but hopefully one that touched your heart.
To me, the big story here is how you worked with mindful awareness of your reactions, such that you weren't ruled by them and instead found a way to connect with someone very different from you.
Christopher Landriau: You express it well. The piece "unfolds like the pace of your walks."
Chris did say it very well!
I love the way you write! While reading this I wish for you to write a novel someday. A book to hold with thick pages that have raw edges. The cover would draw us in without a word needed. I see your photo on the back cover with your bright smile and cool glasses. Your bio would be somehow woven into the story you would tell. xoxxo
Well, my dear friend, I do have in mind to write a memoir. In fact, I even have a book coach! Thanks for sharing my vision and for your friendship. You mean a lot to me!
Yes! I wish for that too!
What a beautiful reminder that we never know what our fellow travelers are going through. All we can do is spread kindness.
Thanks, for the reminder that a little kindness goes a long way.
Loved the post Ilona! Not something I would normally read but you drew me right in. I imagine we all have Franks in our lives. Thanks for sharing (even on a rerun!!)
Such a sweet story and I imagine your giving Frank your attention made a difference, even if you weren't aware of it. A man went to work for my husband's company and for awhile I just thought of him as one of the many people who, for whatever reason, had been down on his luck for many years. He struggled, and one job he could do, and do well, was man the parking lot booth at the local bank. He also offered to paint our back porch ceiling. It was hot that summer. As he stood on the ladder in the heat of the day, I made sure he stayed hydrated and brought him many glasses of ice water or iced tea., but then went back in the house and never really talked at length with him. Then he began to cough...a lot. It turned out he had lung cancer. My husband and I visited him in the hospital, and as far as we could tell, no one else came. When he passed away, the bank employees were heart-broken. Apparently, they loved him dearly and all had developed relationships with him. The bank had a bronze plaque made in his likeness with his name and put it on the parking lot booth in his honor. I felt like I never knew him like they did. It made me want to let people in and really get to know their story.
Wow, Linda. I can so relate to your story. I think Frank may also have been down on his luck, like many who live in that rooming house. My heart is glad that you visited your Frank in the hospital. I'm sure seeing you was a bright spot in his day. As Marylee Pangman said (above), we all know a Frank.
Yes...we do. I want to be one who really "sees" all the Franks who cross my path. I want to be better.
Ah. I relate to this letter. Not because of Frank, although I feel your pain. But because I have to walk our Sophie with the same caution. She is a sweetheart of a rescue. But she is nervous (long story for another time).
When I saw the picture of the kids (beautiful - and what a wise inquisitive look on the face of the little one!) it reminded me of our child care "job" during Covid. Daycare and preschool were shut down. We took two very young boys M-F so their parents could work from home. It felt good to make a difference and selfishly influence them in some tiny way that they might carry into adulthood.
Thanks for a fine story.
Thanks, Bill! Polly is a rescue, too. We didn't want a pit but this breed is predominant at the shelters. She is actually the best dog ever, except for her leash aggression problem. Mostly she's just a scaredy cat. She is great with my grandkids though.
Isn't that just life? Nice that you became friends, regardless of whether you knew he was dying.
Yes, I'm glad to have known him. Thanks, Sue.
That’s such a touching story Ilona. You have immortalised Frank by telling story regardless of how little you knew him. I can already see him in my mind. Brilliant post.
I like what you said-I have immortalized Frank. Everyone needs to know that their lives mattered. Thanks, Neera!
Oh Ilona, this is so beautiful! I love hearing about how you taught yoga to people with issues - i.e. any of us, really - prior to Covid. How you felt nervous at first when Frank showed up on the street. How you gradually warmed to him, at least a little. And then the shock when he died, and you thought of all the questions you wish you'd asked. I'll be thinking about this piece for a while. Thanks for re-sharing it.
I have had some bad situations with men, if you remember my post about the Bear a few months ago. You made a comment on that post as well. So no, I wasn't open and friendly to Frank, but he didn't seem put off by it. I think everything unfolded as intended by the universe, if you believe in that type of thing. I believe both Frank and I were enriched by our brief encounter.
Ilona Goanos: Thank you for reposting this beautiful reflection which says so much about your love and compassion, which makes me very glad to have come to know you.
I love the little kids!
May Frank and all who encounter you with their tragedies find persons to comfort and love them. May Frank rest in peace!
Yes, may he rest in peace. I imagine his life was fraught with considerable bad luck. Thanks for reading and your words of encouragement, Armand.
`I am thrilled to be on equal footing with my dog and worthy of Carol’s attention.` -> this really cracked me up.
The dog walker dilemma.
I know right? I do the same thing if I'm being truthful. I give all my attention to the dog, not the owner. 🤣