Craft Awesome Letters From Now On: Think, Feel, Write and Send!

Write someone a letter today.

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Thanks, dear friends, for supporting me last week on the post about my mom. Her birthday was yesterday, and she would have been 87. Family member's birthdays and anniversary dates leave such thick grooves inside us, don't they? Since I started online writing in 2020, I've told myself several times that I need to move on and stop writing about my parents. Yet, last week, I wrote another essay about them.

Let's just say at age 61, I'm still processing. Maybe when I finish writing my book, I’ll finally be done.

Speaking of special occasions, I stopped in a shop in town the other day, one I should not go into. You know the store--the one that makes you buy things you don't need. It is always a great place to get one-of-a-kind gifts for a baby or housewarming, neither of which I needed. Yet, the vortex sucked me in.

Why is everything so darling in that shop?

Jewelry, stationery, home decor, eyeglasses, baby toys, and women's clothes--something for every woman. On the front shelf right by the entrance, I glimpsed a book called "How to Write a Letter."

The book cover was the most delicate shade of pink, so alluring that I had to pick it up from the shelf. In my decades-long career as a government contractor, I had already written hundreds of letters and thousands more email missives. I’ve learned to bend words to my will to achieve the desired end without getting in hot water with my boss or customers.

Letter writing is my superpower.

The skill developed early as my mother made me write letters for her, which she would dictate. She knew how to speak English but didn't feel confident expressing herself in writing.

"Write this. No, say this! Why did you write that? Start over, that's not right."

Even if I transcribed her words precisely, in my very best penmanship, I would be at fault for not capturing what she meant. Writing letters in English for immigrant parents and being their correspondent to the outside world is a big responsibility. I was a kid who wasn't yet wise to the world and could only do so much. I learned to channel what she wanted to say and dug deep to understand what she wanted.

So, I couldn’t resist the heft of a 5" by 7" blush hardback and thumbed through it, wondering who would buy it. I know non-letter writers exist. When I recently asked our Greek tour guide, Spiros, where his island's mailboxes were, a youthful, blank face peered back. He mumbled something unintelligible when it dawned on me that he didn't know what I was talking about.

When I said, "You don't know what a mailbox is," he admitted that he did not.

Young people don't see the point of writing letters since they’ve always had modern immediate means to express themselves. Forty years ago, when my husband and I wrote to each other while he was in law school 300 miles away, the sight of his handwriting on an envelope peeking out of a pile of bills was as precious as gold.

Maybe the younger generation is correct, and the world is well past handwritten or typed letters—except why was this book in my hand? I bought it because my curiosity forced me to bring it home. (Remember, I was in a vortex.)

The 138 pages spanned many obvious and nuanced aspects of letter writing, such as what type of paper to use, the best pens available, how to address an envelope, and buying suitable stamps in advance and storing them.

The meatiest and best part was when the authors suggested what to say according to the circumstances. Sample letters show what to write to thank your hostess, congratulate your friend on her new baby, or murkier topics when "it's complicated." Authors Chelsea Shukov and Jamie Grobecker thought of it all.

Their book complements my earlier post about personalizing and making cards. Even though I'm enthusiastic about making cards as a creative outlet, sometimes I need help with how to say something. I second-guess my words as sounding off or weird, especially after a lifetime of relying on Hallmark to say it for me. This book supplies a generous assortment of words to encapsulate all the feels.

This is where letter-writing excels.

You have to think before you write so that the letter receiver will understand what you mean. You can’t send an unorganized mess! Everything should flow logically.

Building awareness of your emotions is another step to making your letter superior, especially compared to the volume of bland, auto-generated content out there. Posers can imitate but never manufacture true feelings, which makes us human. When the feelings are strong enough, the words just flow.

Think of the love letters you’ve written or received.

Or worse, have you received an angry letter from someone you care about?

Once your words are out there, there’s no taking them back. Think again: How do you want the person to feel after reading your letter? Choose your words with care.

Shukov and Grobecker’s book inspired me to keep on writing my book. If these ladies can write a book about the “ancient” art of letter writing, there’s hope for you and me, too.

Have you recently considered writing a hand-written or typed letter to someone?

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Postcards, anyone?

A few months ago, I asked if you wanted to receive a postcard from me when I visited Greece this past June. Well, it turns out community members enjoyed receiving my cards.

I’m headed to Scandinavia next, and you’re welcome to get on my postcard list for this trip. I still have the May 2024 list, so you will automatically get a card if you already sent me your address. New folks who want a postcard, please send me your address by 1. Replying to this email 2. Sending me a private message on Substack or 3. Writing to me at my email address info@thepebbleinyourshoe.com.

Hey, if you’re still reading, you’re gonna love this picture of my smiley new grandson, Julian.

Photo by Julian’s Momma