I Paid Yoga Money for This, but I’m Giving It to You for Free

A little food for thought this holiday.

Photo by Autumn Mott Rodeheaver on Unsplash

I've had tons of yoga training in the past seven years. Even after reaching the 500-hour tier of education, the pay to teach here at the Jersey Shore is miserable. The pay not only sucks, but three local yoga studios have stiffed me.

So much for embracing the eight limbs of yoga.

Yoga is a business like everything else in America. Yoga teachers are ubiquitous, like life coaches. Unfortunately, there are predators and grifters throughout the wellness industry. (Read

Christina Waggaman

’s article on this subject here.)

Earnings from teaching pale compared to the career I hated and worked in for 25 years. I’m grateful to be out of the corporate grind, but yoga teachers are a dime a dozen, which is reflected in their pay and treatment.

Whenever we are ready to make a significant purchase, my husband often jokes, "Let's use the yoga money."

Good one, Laz!

Often, what we love doing is different from what pays the rent. We do the things we love regardless of how much they cost or what we will get in return.

Love is love. My investment has rewarded me in other ways.

My love for yoga has overflowed to two of my kids, who also became yoga teachers. Luckily, they both have day jobs.

Yoga has given me the tools to keep my body mostly pain-free and my mind somewhat manageable. I learned different South Asian philosophies and religions I would never have touched upon or been enriched by. My global perspective has expanded because of it.

I met countless beautiful teachers who showed me a different way of being.

One teacher taught me a phrase that has always stayed in my mind. She told us we must treat our students with unconditional positive regard.

Unconditional positive regard.

When offered unconditional positive regard, it transforms you. It's just so damn generous because it gives you limitless grace. No one knows what somebody’s been through to think, say, or act like they do.

Giving them a break when they seem so off track takes a big person.

My teacher modeled this behavior with us, and I do my best to let my students know that I love, honor, and respect them.

I give this in a one-hour class.

I can do almost anything for an hour. Let me be honest, though. Once I'm out of class, I can't maintain this mindset.

Here’s an example.

My daughter and son-in-law were in a car accident this past weekend. The other driver lost control of his speeding vehicle and crossed their lane. All made it out alive and are recovering, but this accident altered my kids’ lives forever.

Unconditional positive regard for the man who caused the accident is a herculean effort.

I don't know when I'll be there.

I blame him, but I don't know why he chose to act that way on that day at that hour and how those in his sphere influenced him or his behavior. The tendrils of responsibility reach far. What if they make their way all the way back to me? The earth is a circle, after all.

For every action, there is a reaction.

With that admission, here's my advice to you this holiday.

Unconditional positive regard requires a constant flow of love in and out. Doing things from love takes effort and is rarely the easy way. I can tap into the well of love if I consciously slow down and open to it.

With our country and world so divided, let's prioritize offering unconditional positive regard first and foremost to ourselves.

You know, like when you burn the walnuts for your special Thanksgiving salad or forget to buy the dinner rolls.

Then, test it out on an easy-to-love person. From there, graduate to someone who mildly annoys you. If you can still manage, focus on the one who will inevitably press all your buttons.

Throw unconditional, limitless love at all of it. That's the only thing that will work.

I've saved you yoga money today. You may still be unable to buy that Porsche, but I hope I’ve convinced you of something more valuable. Unconditional positive regard can change the world.

For those who are sad this holiday because you're missing your loved ones, I see you. For those who get anxious because of the stress of the holidays, take a deep breath and remember you can say no to part or all of it.

I'm so grateful for your presence in this community. Stay on the gratitude vibe with me, and together, we’ll be flying high. Love to you all!