I so relate to this and it took me years to figure out why it was harder to make new friendships and why my lifelong friends seemed to be losing interest in maintaining our friendship. I moved to a new town a couple of years ago and I began attending some groups for women in town. That is fun and makes me feel less lonely but one day I met a woman at the hairdresser's also new to the area We bonded and have spent lots of time together already. Also, I have made it a point to get to know neighbors and this has helped as well...but it's not easy.
I'm lucky to live in the place I was born, so I've been able to maintain a lifelong friendship with one of my besties from high school, made even deeper after she was diagnosed with cancer. As my former husband had cancer and all our friends vanished, I vowed to be there for my friend. I called and asked her what she'd like. We live about four hours apart. She wanted to come to my place and "stare at the water" after her initial surgery, and subsequently, we scheduled weekly calls through the year of cancer treatments. We like being in deep touch so much we're still doing the weekly calls! I'm also lucky to be in recovery from addiction/alcoholism, so I started a support group for women in a charming town about an hour from my house. People in recovery can have sort of an instant bond, but this has turned out to be amazing. I'd say almost every woman there has become a new friend. I'm so grateful!
You are lucky that your relationships have such deep roots. I do have a couple of friends from my time growing up in Philadelphia which I cherish. I quit drinking four years ago, and I agree that there is a bond with former drinkers, even those who don't identify as alcoholics.
Ilona, thank you so much for sharing this. Making friends is so vital for good health and fulfilled life. And keeping the old ones as well. Yesterday I have spent some quality time with my good old friends that we have a lot of history with. It felt like a medicine and I love the increasing quality of it as time goes by. Good luck in your writing journey.
Firstly, Happy Birthday! I hope you have a great week. Secondly I binged watched Grace and Frankie, I thought it was brilliant, those two women have so much energy! I've never been very good at maintaining friendships and wish I had made more effort now to keep in touch with old friends who have now moved on. It's never too late to make new ones though, sometimes a new friend can make you feel you've known them for years.
Yes, agreed! When my children lived at home and I was working, I didn't have the time to give attention to my friends, nor they me. But those friendships have been easy to pick back up, despite the distance that separates us. Who knows? Maybe an old friend and I will be housemates some day, like Grace and Frankie.
Thanks for re-posting this one, Ilona! It is so true! I still have many friends in Flagstaff that I spend time with after retiring, but I worry about finding a new community once we move to Washington, whenever that happens. We discovered Grace and Frankie last year and streamed all the seasons episodes in a month - loved it! Glad you had a great birthday and glad to have made a connection with you!
Yes, when you move you'll have to make an effort to find local friends. It's taken a while, but I finally have them. I'll write an article about that, too. Thanks for the birthday wishes, and for your thoughtful comment.
Happy birthday week! I loved the show Grace and Frankie! Grace reminded me of my grandmother and the Grace/Frankie relationship reminds me of my lifelong best friend. It is hard to find new friendships but I’d rather have quality than quantity.
Yes, one true friend is better than a dozen superficial ones. We find out who are true friends are when life gets tough and they're still there. Thanks for the birthday wishes, Marlo.
I love this article, and I know that you are living these beautiful principles every day. Thank you for enriching my life as you are doing so for countless others. Happy Birthday. 🎈 May your year ahead be even more fulfilling.
I so relate to this and it took me years to figure out why it was harder to make new friendships and why my lifelong friends seemed to be losing interest in maintaining our friendship. I moved to a new town a couple of years ago and I began attending some groups for women in town. That is fun and makes me feel less lonely but one day I met a woman at the hairdresser's also new to the area We bonded and have spent lots of time together already. Also, I have made it a point to get to know neighbors and this has helped as well...but it's not easy.
Yes, there are many people out there who would be thrilled to have you as a friend. Truly, you are an amazing person, Linda!
Awww...well I have a new one in you!
I'm lucky to live in the place I was born, so I've been able to maintain a lifelong friendship with one of my besties from high school, made even deeper after she was diagnosed with cancer. As my former husband had cancer and all our friends vanished, I vowed to be there for my friend. I called and asked her what she'd like. We live about four hours apart. She wanted to come to my place and "stare at the water" after her initial surgery, and subsequently, we scheduled weekly calls through the year of cancer treatments. We like being in deep touch so much we're still doing the weekly calls! I'm also lucky to be in recovery from addiction/alcoholism, so I started a support group for women in a charming town about an hour from my house. People in recovery can have sort of an instant bond, but this has turned out to be amazing. I'd say almost every woman there has become a new friend. I'm so grateful!
You are lucky that your relationships have such deep roots. I do have a couple of friends from my time growing up in Philadelphia which I cherish. I quit drinking four years ago, and I agree that there is a bond with former drinkers, even those who don't identify as alcoholics.
Ilona, thank you so much for sharing this. Making friends is so vital for good health and fulfilled life. And keeping the old ones as well. Yesterday I have spent some quality time with my good old friends that we have a lot of history with. It felt like a medicine and I love the increasing quality of it as time goes by. Good luck in your writing journey.
Thanks, Tomas. Yes, good friends can make you feel so good inside, especially if you haven't seen them for a while. Good luck to you as well!
Thanks for reposting this, Ilona. Very relevant and I need to hear it more than once sometimes. Also, that song is beautiful.
I think we all benefit from reminding. You're a great friend to have!
I’m happy to have you as a friend too!
Firstly, Happy Birthday! I hope you have a great week. Secondly I binged watched Grace and Frankie, I thought it was brilliant, those two women have so much energy! I've never been very good at maintaining friendships and wish I had made more effort now to keep in touch with old friends who have now moved on. It's never too late to make new ones though, sometimes a new friend can make you feel you've known them for years.
Yes, agreed! When my children lived at home and I was working, I didn't have the time to give attention to my friends, nor they me. But those friendships have been easy to pick back up, despite the distance that separates us. Who knows? Maybe an old friend and I will be housemates some day, like Grace and Frankie.
Thanks for re-posting this one, Ilona! It is so true! I still have many friends in Flagstaff that I spend time with after retiring, but I worry about finding a new community once we move to Washington, whenever that happens. We discovered Grace and Frankie last year and streamed all the seasons episodes in a month - loved it! Glad you had a great birthday and glad to have made a connection with you!
Yes, when you move you'll have to make an effort to find local friends. It's taken a while, but I finally have them. I'll write an article about that, too. Thanks for the birthday wishes, and for your thoughtful comment.
Happy birthday week! I loved the show Grace and Frankie! Grace reminded me of my grandmother and the Grace/Frankie relationship reminds me of my lifelong best friend. It is hard to find new friendships but I’d rather have quality than quantity.
Yes, one true friend is better than a dozen superficial ones. We find out who are true friends are when life gets tough and they're still there. Thanks for the birthday wishes, Marlo.
I love this article, and I know that you are living these beautiful principles every day. Thank you for enriching my life as you are doing so for countless others. Happy Birthday. 🎈 May your year ahead be even more fulfilling.
Thanks, TBG! You are amazing and I consider myself lucky to be your friend. Thanks for being you 🤍
Thank you for this post, Ilona. And especially thank you for the song.
I sent it to a friend who really needs it right now.
So glad to know you!